Thursday, September 29, 2016

persepsi lain itu eksklusif

usap aku diriku sendiri, air mata mengalir di pipi, di sini tempat aku, bercampur kenangan pahit juga manis, bilik ini, segalanya tempatku.

Bermonolog aku dengan sendiri,
"jangan menangis sayang," menitis air mata.
"jangan lemah, kuatkanlah. Siapa lagi yang perlu beriak kuat kalau bukan kau?" air mata semakin laju membasahi pipi.
"ujian dari Allah, walau pedih kau tetap harus mengatasi," kata-kata lembut yang keluar dari mulutku sendiri makin menggetarkan perasaan, air mata lebat mengalir di pipi.

Selama ini kubiar sepi, diam, kaku.
terhadapnya si mereka yang berkicau sumbang,
ku tenggelam dengan segala.

sapaan kecil penuh tersirat,
menyedarkan aku yang hanya berdiri kaku,
bingkas aku mengatur langkah,
menegakkan tekaan serong di minda si manusia-manusia.


maaf tapi aku manusia
terkesan dengan kata-kata itu biasa
walau bagaimana hidup yang aku lalui
mohon diberi laluan

aku juga manusia
yang mahukan pengakhirannya bahagia
sama seperti kamu-kamu juga


hidup aku berbeza
berbeza yang bagaimana itu biarlah menjadi simpanan
lambat laun aku tahu ia pasti akan disiar
yang pasti aku tahu perbezaan yang sedikit ini berbeza


ibu masih lagi tenang sambil mencicah, aku bagai amat perlu perhatian darinya, tertekan aku menghadap seorang, aku perlu seorang untuk aku luah, kongsi bersama. Gesaan aku mengganggunya,
tersenyumnya ke arahku. Lalu, kata-kata menitir di bibirnya;

"Anak ibu, manusia takkan pernah berhenti, walau dia berhenti pasti sambungannya bakal muncul. Sekiranya benar disalah-salahkan, inikan pula yang salah. Ingat pesan ibu; antara kita yang bersungut susah semahunya ini harus sentiasa ingat ini, simpan dalam ingatan, jangan pernah terfikir susahnya kita itu adalah yang paling susah, yang pastinya di setiap susah kita itu pasti ada sekecil kesenangan, jangan pernah lupa yang pasti juga ada manusia yang lebih susah dari kehidupan kita. Seperti kita, masih mampu untuk memenuhi kemahuan diri kita sendiri, jangan bersedih ya anak ibu, ibu akan sentiasa ada,"

kata-kata yang menyedarkan aku, aku lupa segala ini.

(entah kenapa aku mahukan kisah lain bagai pengajaran di pagi Jumaat ini)
moga dimanfaatkan.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

An awkward hello-

... As soon as I reached, I saw a flat cloud, iron-grey and blue across the place. The closer I got to the shoreline, the more clearly it was defined. I walked along and saw it was a series of undulating sand dunes. And there, a young lady, down a dune four hundred feet away and some minutes later, on those undulating dunes, we walked toward each other under the grey sky. I silently looking at her ; she was a real walker - arms swinging, flat shoes, no cap, no map. It was lovely, too, grey sky above, the sun in the southwest, and a cloudburst falling like a broken bag in the east. I watched this lady, this fairly young lady, in her warm scarf and a bunch of flowers in her hand. I watched her come on. She did not look at me. She drew level and did not notice me. There was no other human being in sight on the beach, deserted for once, only for a lone fishing boat. She walked past me and still with stony-faced.

"Em, hello!" I said.
"Oh," she turned her head to me. "Hello-"

She gave me a good smile - because I am the one who had spoken first. But if I hadn't, 
we would have passed each other on that lonely beach, 
not another soul around, 
five feet apart without a word.


Thursday, September 08, 2016

random questions I've got / I've made

u must be a good advisor cause it seems like one from the way u write in blog yeah
and also a good listener
This is such a nice ever, I'll keep this in mind forever hoho. I'm not sure about that but I love to write about what I've see, what I've go through in this life and everything. I hope I'm a good advisor to myself too--

Hows mj?
everything is fine--

Heartbroken, need some healing
I don't know if I should answer this question cause I've through this hurt moments too. I know how much the pain, everyday you can feel it, even years. But, you should stand up, put smile on your face, do something that can make you happy and even if you can forgot it for awhile, it is the best so far cause it is the process in order to forget all of the hurt things in your life. You have to play well with your feelings because sometimes if you're seriously focused on your feelings, in will turn into bad things-- so, be happy dear sweetheart.

Asking you for some tutobies cause ur blog is fun to visit like,....everytime hikhik
nah I'm not good in those things btw thankyou for visiting my blog like,...everytime hikhik xoxo!

mmg minat art?
ya saya sangat meminati bidang art huhu.

“Remember, when things were hard, you always turned my tears into smiles. Don’t cry in places without me because you always had a lot of tears.”
I don't know who are you but, thankyou. This is like a little present but such a big impact to me. Thanks again!

Keep fighting on your journey! Hwaiting!!
I will in shaa Allah, thankyou, may Allah bless you! Hwaiting too xx

If u really want to know if someone cares and loves u,
just see whether they take u towards sin or if they protect u from it.


A picture of yourself


What I would find in your bag
Lipbalm, telephone, a pen, journal book, purse
{because of that I prefer  using backpack or totebag}

Last song I listened to
Secret love song by Little Mix

Your favorite thing to get at a restaurant
my favourite: ice lemon tea or ice cappuccino

First 5 songs on shuffle
  1. Suatu Pernah - Fynn Jamal
  2. A Little Love - Fiona Fung
  3. Pillow Talk - Zayn Malik
  4. Lara Lagi - Adira
  5. Look at Me Now - Speed
What I want to be when I'm older
graphic designer or novelist or a teacher

5 facts about me 
  1. I am the youngest child
  2. I am so in love with cartoon,"Sofia The First" but not too obsess
  3. Back then, I love to keep chocolate wrappers
  4. I am absolutely love to wear shades
  5. I love to explore dictionary

Top 5 favourite books
  1.  Sumbat by Faizal Sulaiman
  2.  Penjara Rindu by Nia Arisaa
  3.  Gadis Kecil di Pinggir Gaza by Vanny Chrisma W.
  4.  This is a Love Story by Jessica Thompson
  5.  The Fault in our Stars by John Green

Something I really, really want; right now
food; I didn't take my breakfast yet, hihi

What I did yesterday
Oh, since yesterday is the last day of school before holiday & aidiladha celebration, some of my friends and I decided to go to the nearest supermaket and had lunch together, play some games, gossip, shopping (books & stuff), yeah I think I am so happy yesterday. Weepii

Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Why?
Rejection : Cause everyone like me who scare of rejection wouldn't did it. I didn't have courage to tell something that mostly important to me to others. At least, if I am really sure I've set the best way, I will. I will

Battery percentage right now
My laptop; 73%

Recommend 3 blogs, why (make it short) ?
  1. Izza Atirah ; she always update her life routine and others relate; I love it
  2. analysis paralysis ; well, I always found a new words that I don't know,
                                   so I had fun reading her blog
  3. Crownist : honestly, I'm just found this blog, and I immediately fall in love,
                      her blog is cool. Simple but totally nice! Oh, she is also a newbie
Complete this sentence: "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
"I wish I had someone with whom I could share all my happiness rather than sharing my sadness cause everyone had their own problems which is they kept it as secret or to share with the people that they've put trust on. Our happiness is worth to share with other people; in other reason, it could make 'the others' feel and join their happiness too (so the love will be bigger). Sadness must suit the situation, we can share it, but we must know the condition of the person that we would be tellin' our problems. So, as I can conclude, we could share everything to people but we have to suit the atmosphere, don't be too hard to heard others' opinion; don't be selfish, respect others, be good."

A quote from someone you know
"You are imperfect, but other of yours make you looks special; the imperfect will not lost but will be fading. Now, the perfect side will be showing, be prepare."

If your life was a novel, what would the tittle be?
"Jars of neglect Journal"

Which gives you the most pleasure; giving presents or receiving them?
For me, giving and receiving, both are pleasure. In giving presents to someone, I will put as many of my effort to make the one receive feels grateful, happy and so on. For receiving, I think this better cause I will make sure to take care of it; we will be more appreciate if we got something from people, is it right?

Screenshot your desktop

me love to be simple

So, if you want to try this random question by me,
 I've prepared the questions for you guys:
right click > open link in new tab > save photo
please leave a comment if you take the photo or you try the questions, I will visit your blog!


so, have question to ask?